Christ in Yan

just back from MediaCorp. went to support F1, Feng Yi.
was pretty quiet throughout the day i suppose. becos ytd when i was watching the DVD, i visualised myself being the worship leader on stage singing and dancing serving the Lord. so... went quiet and start to have thoughts if i should enrol myself into a music school and start training on vocals. i like to sing, though i may not have a good voice. definately, if i enrol, the fees will be on me. i should start working and save up! of cos, PRIORITIES. anyway, applying for jobs already. i'm so enthu about working. becos all my hard earned will be spent wisely.

Who we will be 10yrs later will not be who we are NOW! i may be a little shrimp now, i might be a big fish soon! =)

Exams is still fine. not too hard, manageable. so PTL! two more papers to go! and off for my own stuffs! =p

HAIIII.. i'm emo. for today. i just felt extra suddenly. am talking to 2 person now. and i feel like whenever i mix with them, somehow something will happen. or a "conversation" will begin. whats worse, it's not direct. i wonder why we have to be so secretive though we seem like not. i like the company of people, but it seems like my presence made them so hard to have an open life. why people who doubt things, have wonders and questions about me, cant just ask me!? FACE TO FACE! i'm quite pissed, now actually. just controlling still...

perhaps its some form of concern? protective about the weaker person!? haii. IT WAS ALL A STUPID MISTAKE I MADE! i just feel like there're so much gossips behind me right now. i'm feeling upset, and down. when i need a physical pillar, what is it? my pillow. but i know, my spiritual pillar is just beside me right now.

the person who'll make me smile is no longer here. =( i kinda miss that person.... things changes, people changes, thinking changes, feelings change. however, God is the SAME, yesterday, today and forever!

i just need a bucket. perhaps i should get one pink nice bucket. at least i'll feel better looking at it next time.

posted by Yan @ 11/09/2006 12:58:00 AM