Christ in Yan

i'm totally disappointed in the reply i got from my classmates.
i've done all i need to do, even to the extent of reminding everyone to bring their money so that things could be easier for all of us. and i thought that all will be responsible for it as they said ok. and i THOUGHT i'm gonna have a easier time. but.. it's all thoughts.

i'm glad that miss yvonne is so ON to join us. miss jasmine will try to stay overnight with us. but miss na didn't even reply to my sms. =(

anyway, whatever it is, i'll still hold the BBQ by hook or by crook.
the ones attending i'll try to meet all their needs.
though we're at the same level, classmates. but when i'm the organiser, i'll do my best. hopefully they'll do theirs.
but plans might change somehow due to some reasons, but i know God will help me plan the backup plan.

i'm just so fan. and i dont know why.
perhaps i'm not happy with my nap just now?
cos of the class?
or some other issues? like people asking obvious questions in my this kinda mood. totally, irritated. but of cos, i wont scold them la. only pour out to this blog.
everything will be fine soon. =)

early class tmr at 9.30am. and i heard that the collection of O lvl cert is till tmr. but i didn't receive any notice about it.
what's more, i dont wanna wake up at 7am tmr and rush to sch, walking the long distance to sess. argh. it's another fan thing.
laziness is a sin. i'll try to wake up early tmr.

didn't had tuition with marc today as he's getting some PO. hopefully he's doing well in his studies. =)

okies, thats all of my fan-ness for today.
nites!

posted by Yan @ 4/27/2006 11:38:00 PM 0 Comments

oh yes, tmr gonna give an usher a topical tuition. hehe.
i'm really looking forward. lalala.
pray that God gimme wisdom and strength!
though tmr is like a short day. hehe.
nites people! =)

posted by Yan @ 4/27/2006 12:33:00 AM 0 Comments

i'm so hyper now.
firstly, i've finished the work i'm supposed to hand in this week. and best, i've doen the next week due maths assignment! =p
secondly, i'm planning the class BBQ next week now.
wheee, i'm so super excited la. =)

posted by Yan @ 4/25/2006 12:50:00 AM 0 Comments

i pray that the lemon can get out of my legs now! ha.
so painful, next time i must rmb not to wear heels for ext. blisters and pains.
but it's all worth it. =)

external today. yea, i learnt quite a number of things! hehe.
at least i'm not super noob to outside next time.

school again tmr! and before that will be returning to sess to get my cert.
so, nites people.

posted by Yan @ 4/23/2006 10:03:00 PM 0 Comments

pls ignore the post about those people who care.
cos i know that it's already a bliss when people care for me.
compare with those who dont have people to concern about them, i'm having a far too great life with so many supporters behind me.
over here, i'd like to say a big thank you for those who're really concern aboout me. =)

posted by Yan @ 4/22/2006 10:54:00 PM 0 Comments

i'm back! yay!
i've finished ALL my hmwk, gosh, so guai now?
i should say kinda, cos each yr i study, i'll try to find out the best to improve!
this is alrdy the 2nd time taking O's.
i dont wanna waste my time anymore.
i'm not saying that my life is no good, but it's very good in fact! =)
i dont regret taking my O's again and studying now.
it's so fun! hehe.

but, a few tests coming up next week.
oh ya, i missed ytd's audition for my school's vocal cca.
hopefully miss yvonne will still take me in.
if not, it's ok. =p

chem is improving. whereas physics is like pulling the grades down.
no way i'm sitting here doing nth, shall brush up more!

cgm later.
hopefully everything will be fine.
seriously, there're some stuffs in the bottom of my heart about it.
but i think i just need more time.

have a good wkend ppl! =)

posted by Yan @ 4/22/2006 12:19:00 PM 0 Comments

clearing all my hmwk now to have a more relax wkend.
shhhhhh.
btw, i've alrdy done half! haha
one more assignment to go and woohooo!

posted by Yan @ 4/21/2006 11:28:00 PM 0 Comments

yes, things sometimes really dont turn out the way we want them to.
thats a sad case.

anyway, i'm really improving in my chem. lalala.
i'm so proud to say, i am learning and not lazing around like the past. woohoo.
loving my school days, cos they include studying with fun people and working at the same time.
calculated my ''pay'' for this month, it's like my one whole week allowance. ard there. quite good alrdy ok? work for few days then got pay just by skipping my lunches. one stone kill so many birds. hehe.

i'm crazy. nites ppl! =)

posted by Yan @ 4/20/2006 11:58:00 PM 0 Comments

mood has been rather down this few days.
perhaps it's because of the disappointment of myself and the tireness.
plus so many things happening in the family.
totally i dont have mood to do anything.
i cant even confirm with my usher when can i meet him to fellowship.
am i not fit to be a leader? or just that this time is totally a time when i really cant focus on the things i'm sippose to do.
frankly, i'm pretty demoralised by the actions i did last sun.
the moment of foolishness, lowered me by so many steps.
but dont worry, i'm still moving on.
just that it seems like i've slowed down in my pace.

also, the decision he made too affected me.
yes, it's the truth.
but i'm still standing firm.
all the best in your future paths and choices you gonna make.

why make it so rush? cant i have more time to settle my stuffs first?
yes i know it's important too. but i think priority is not that yet.

tears roll down. but i'm getting over that matter.
it'll happen to everyone one day.
the matter is to accept it or not.

thank God for some supporting friends around me.
encouraging and always making sure i'm in better mood than now.
i dislike the night time, when my friends were all ''away'' from me.
but i know someone who'll always be here, Jesus.
thank You Lord.

posted by Yan @ 4/19/2006 12:15:00 AM 0 Comments

i think i'm a sadist.
just spent a good 20mins in the bathroom trying to get the BIG ANT out of my sight.
i killed it. =(
not delibrate, but i killed it.
i think i'm cruel. but i just cant bath with one big thing crawling ard! eeeeeww.

later, will be a marathon for me. wheee. looking forward.
let's run! =)

posted by Yan @ 4/14/2006 12:03:00 AM 0 Comments

rush rush and rush week.

got caught in a traffic jam today. causing me to be late for 30+mins. gosh, thank God teacher believed what i said as i explained what exactly happened. it's just so irritating when u have to think whether the teacher will believe your reason or not. because, it's just too many times teacher hear students using traffic jam as and excuse for being late when they're actually late on purpose.
well, today what happened to me was true. so, i got nothing to fear. even if i'm marked as late, which i dont want to, i dont wanna end up in area cleaning, i think God will somehow change the situation round. =)

got my maths tests results. i'm pretty satisfied with them. but, when i look at the results now, i'll think of the past. ya, xinyan, u can do it now. meaning, last time u can too! just that i dont put in so much effort as now. REGRETS.
i really dont wanna live my life full of regrets. so from now on, i shall make every decision that will not end me up regretting.

yea, rushing through my hmwk. wanna finish all before the weekend comes and i'll be so super busy.

school, dinners, work. yes! i can!

jia you everybody! =)

posted by Yan @ 4/12/2006 11:28:00 PM 0 Comments

thank God for me having a job which totally match with my school timetable. i only have to work during my break time and after school. or should i say, when i'm free to work. whooo. and the pay is not bad.

this week is gonna be a busy week for me. with big day coming up in a few days time, and meeting up with my ushers, whooo, gonna be a lil busy. so, my week is rather scheduled nicely.

rushing all my work now. to enjoy my weekends serving.
results for the ''term'' is coming out this thurs. wheee, hopefully i see good results afterall. =)

gtg do my work! =p

posted by Yan @ 4/11/2006 10:31:00 PM 0 Comments

my life has been in such a cycle.
-------- morning wake up, take bus to school. after school bus home. do some hmwk, sleep. then the next morning the same thing again. this is my schedule for mon to fri.
except for today, thurs, i get to sleep longer, cook some food for myself and my nephew. hees.
thank God school isn't that boring till i'll grumble about going to school each day! unlike the days in secondary school when school starts at 7.30am, and i have to wake up at 6.30am the latest and cab to school.
that results in me having lesser sleep, spending more money for not being late. =/
but i somehow miss those days when i drag myself out of bed. ha. contradicting? but they're really memories for me to remember.

oh ya, the pasar malam at khatib is gonna open soon!!! and i'm gonna have more yummy food. lalala. the food in pasar malam is cheap, and yummy. i love the sharkfin soup. though it's FAKE, it's nicer than those real ones! they contain more ingredients than those real ones. really, try it. =) me and lun are crazy over it and are awaiting the stall to open. hehes.

things are going well for me. so i'll always reply a good to regards messages. dont blame me for giving such boring replies, because i dont have other words to describe now. sometimes good, sometimes bad. fine.
i only really share my thoughts to people who i know well and trust.

a moment ago, i read this ''certificate'' thing given by someone on Christmas last year, and i feel so upset. cos it seems like i can no longer show that kinda care, chat and find out whats bothering the person anymore. haii.
*always being there when i need you. do i? no longer. i dont even know if the person is upset anot.
*understanding my moods and knowing my dearest desires. no longer either..
*loving me when i'm up or down and in-between. no longer, as i said i dont even know what the person is doing lately.
*being a source of patience, love, and strength, even when i'm irrational. no longer too. =(
*somehow bringing out the best in me. almost no contact, how to?

i agree with what the cert stated, that was when we were in the best of best friends time. now, not. i miss the friendship, brother and sister relationship.
so far till now, i guess the person still knows me the best compared to my other closer friends.
time has passed, memories may have been forgotten. but the friendship is still hanging.
i realised i have lost loads of contact with my friends. somehow, somewhere, someone shall take the first step.
however, i'm still trying to find time to contact those people. so, i shall stop here and go do my homework, leave home for school and meanwhile contact them.

ya, i also owe some lunch meal dates with various people. i'll really find time.. =/

last of all, i didn't forget two persons birthday!!!
4th of April, Eric turned 17. happy belated birthday over here! cos i wished him on the day itself.
today, 6th April, Cindy turned 17 too!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU~

and my birthday.................... still long. 27th Sept. come quick come quick. i cant wait to grow one year older. though it wont make any difference. hees.

posted by Yan @ 4/06/2006 11:14:00 AM 0 Comments

this blog has been stagnant for ard 2wks.
just dont have the mood and time to sit still here to type.
now i shall. hees.

years just passed so fast.
i remembered one 1st of april the famous star commited suicide.
and 2 days ago was april fools' day again.
this time, i managed to fool people!! haha. so fun. opps.

anyway, loads of things happened in this two weeks.
actually, i alrdy forgotten about what has happened.
but it's not bad. cos i usually remember sadness easier! haha.

i love school. i love chemistry.
i love the subjects which i can do well and understand.
i know that love shouldn't be used this way. because love requires sacrifice. but, i just dunno how to replace the word.

okies, tomorrow is a long day for me in school.
and i shall rot. ha! nonono, i shall enjoy! wheee. so crappy.
after school will be going down to JW!! yay!

so, nights people. i'm gonna catch da chang jin and bath and sleep!!! =p

posted by Yan @ 4/03/2006 10:14:00 PM 0 Comments